The relentless pressure to jangle when everyone else is jangling
Why sound like yourself when you could sound like somebody else?
As a Christmas present to *me* (I give myself the best presents), I’m doing an online songwriting course with Adrianne Lenker of Big Thief through School of Song. It started last weekend and runs for a month.
I’m feeling unusually wobbly about sharing my music with this group.
For starters, the group is massive. There must be at least a thousand people doing it, all around the world.
The level of talent is HIGH. I would say at least half the people are recording and releasing their own music. The only other person from my city I’ve found so far is a well-known local musician. Everyone can sing and play well, and a scary amount of people can REALLY sing and play.
I’m talking about singing and playing that makes you sink to your knees and weep for the sheer beauty of life.
I mean, it’s lovely, but fuuuuuuck.
But the bit that’s wobbling me way more than all of that?
Everyone is writing in a broadly similar style.
Of course they are. If you haven’t heard Big Thief, they’re a hipster folk band, basically. Open tunings, lilting, meandering melodies, introspective, arty lyrics. It makes sense that fans would write music like that, and then go and sign up to a course like this.
Let me tell you it is VERY HARD not to want to do what they’re doing.
If you’re anything like me, you spend your life looking at what other people are up to and thinking “should I be doing that?” and before you know it, you’re either doing it too or having massive self doubt about doing your own thing.
Being surrounded by people who are doing one style, constantly listening to what they’re creating (jangle jangle, snow falling on the dead tree la la telephone wire) makes ideas pop into my head that sound kind of similar. It colours everything.
It’s hard to throw your little ditty about being a Javier-Bardem-in-No-Country-For-Old-Men-style merciless killer into an ocean of pretty fingerpicking folk songs about lazy Sunday cats and coffee.
I did make myself though. And I am making myself a promise that I will keep on being my weird self and not try too hard to fit in.
And I will also not lean TOO hard the other way (“I’m different! I’m different! Look at me!”) because that isn’t necessarily healthy either.
When you’re making stuff or even LIVING LIFE around other people, it’s so hard to stick to the path you’ve laid out for yourself.
Get too swayed by what other people doing and you end up adrift and not sure who you are. Be too resolutely, stubbornly yourself and you miss a chance to connect, learn and grow.
I’ll let you know how it goes.And if you hear me writing songs about cats or coffee, please call the police.
Px
PS…
I’m listening to: 1965 by the Afghan Whigs and the new Sprints album
Some new stuff: Tiger Island’s next single Bad Women is out a week today and you can pre-save it here.
Chefs eat a variety of different foods from all sources and prepared in myriad ways; it helps them imagine new flavour combinations and serving suggestions, but they’ll still cook what makes them happy. I have every confidence you’ll keep on rocking out in your own unique Penny style, even if your guitar is tuned to all A
Cats and coffee are overrated, but you knew that already. Javier-Bardem-in-No-Country-For-Old-Men-style merciless killer music - now there’s a gap in the market. Also, just the idea of being in a group of 1000 musicians is blowing my mind in the best way!